Loss is a personal experience which can bring our lives to an abrupt halt, both emotionally and physically.
As employers, we must understand how to help our employees navigate these difficult moments with compassion and clarity so that they can focus on the things that really matter.
In 2016, when my mum suddenly died, I stopped working and sleeping. I wanted to be with my family on the other side. My job was able to provide the time I needed to begin to process and recalibrate this life-changing news. Not everyone is as fortunate as I was.
This week marks Grief Awareness Week. Now is the time for HR professionals to consider what they can do to help employees who are grieving.
Starting a conversation
In the UK, we are not good at discussing death and it is difficult to know what to say. It’s not difficult. The first thing to do is just say, simply ‘I’m sorry to hear about your mum/friend/grandparent’ – whether that’s in person, over a message or a thoughtful card – it really is as simple as that. It lets them know that you’re thinking about them, and it helps them to start a conversation if they wish.
Business as usual is not the same
There is no “one size fits all” solution. We are all unique. It’s important to let them know that they are welcome to take a break if necessary and to make plans to fill in for any work with a tight deadline. You can end any messages with ‘no response required’, and ask if you want them to be removed from messages/emails if necessary.
Flexible Work and Leave Arrangements
Grief is physically exhausting. Grief robs our memory, concentration and decision-making abilities, as well as our sleep. It is extremely helpful to understand this as an employee or manager.
In addition to some bereavement time, they may need a flexible return to their job so they can gradually get back into the normal routine. Loss can change the caring responsibilities, which may also require more flexibility. It is important to have an open discussion about this.
Grief doesn’t always look the way that bereavement policies or statutory leave for bereavement make it seem. It’s important that you are flexible and don’t just focus on the short-term. You may also need support at anniversaries, or even months after their death.
Create a place where people can discuss how they are doing
It’s not always easy to talk about how you feel at work when someone close to you has died, but creating a place where people can if they wish to is a great way to help.
It will be worth the investment to give your managers this training and the confidence they need. The companies don’t have to stop here. Employee assistance programs (EAPs), or charities such as the National Bereavement Service, can provide grief counselling. Employees can use this support to express their feelings outside of the workplace.
A problem shared
After the death of a loved one, it’s easy to become isolated. It can also be hard for your colleagues to understand how to help you.
Employees can benefit from peer support groups and a buddy system to communicate with their peers or managers. Employees can check in on each other through informal channels, such as team-building exercises, support groups or simply a culture that encourages employees to be “there for each other.”
Provide Practical Assistance
There is a lot of work to be done after someone passes away. This can take many months or even years. Employers can relieve some of the burden by providing employee benefits such as administrative support for bereavement or probate services.
This will not only let your employees feel valued and supported, but also free them to focus on the important things – both personally and professionally – when they return to work.
Take stock
Grief Awareness Week provides an opportunity for employers to reflect on how they support their employees during some of the most difficult times in their life. Employers who do this well not only treat their employees as human beings but also cultivate a culture of care that benefits the entire team.
